Happy Mother’s Day

One of my favorite things to do is give gifts to people.  Whenever holidays, or birthdays come rolling around I always get excited and instantly start brainstorming ideas.  I even have a file saved on my phone of random gifts for my family in case I am ever in need of inspiration.  I’ve also been guilty of buying random gifts for people out of the blue.  So if you’re my friend…watch out!! You may just find a gift on your doorstep one of these days 🙂

I have a couple of criteria for gifts:

1.  No gift cards–Although I love receiving gift cards, when it comes to other people I prefer the challenge of finding something truly unique on the shelves.

2.  It cannot be on their list–This is one of my favorite rules.  I absolutely love the challenge of finding something totally unexpected and still what they really needed.

3.  Quality over quantity–This one is hard for me because a lot of the gifts that I want to buy my family are usually pretty expensive.  How I wish I had a million dollars…sigh… But lately I have been able to get creative with less money.

So this Mother’s Day my brain got cracking and I started thinking up ideas.  Unfortunately my mother is an extremely hard person to shop for because she likes everything and I wanted to get her something really special that really conveyed my true feelings for her.

Well, Saturday rolled around and I still had nothing.  But not for long!!  Whilst shopping at Target I spotted it, the perfect gift, and into my shopping cart it went.  It was on sale too!! Score!!

In case you were wondering, I got my mom the movie “Fried Green Tomatoes.”  Have you ever seen it?  It is very good.  I remembered that this movie was one of her favorites movies but she only had it on VHS.  Well, since VHS has pretty much become prehistoric (insert dinosaur roar here) I thought it would be a good idea to get it on DVD.

As I was driving home, inspiration struck.  What would be the perfect complement to go with the movie?

Any guesses?

REAL FRIED GREEN TOMATOES!!

I found a recipe online and came up with this version

Fried Green Tomatoes

Ingredients:

3 green tomatoes

1/2c All Purpose Flour

1/2c Bread crumbs

1/2c Milk

2 Beaten Eggs

1/4c Oil

Directions:

Heat a frying pan on the stove with 2 TB of oil until the oil starts bubbling. Slice tomatoes into 1/2 inch thick pieces. Dip slices into milk, then flour, then eggs, then bread crumbs. Fry 2-3 minutes on both sides until crispy.

Note: Make sure you use some kind of splatter guard or something in between cooking so that the oil does not burn you! Hot stuff!!!

Alien "tomatoes" and a few red ones

Assemble the Ingredients!

All lined up, waiting...

Ready to Eat!

This recipe was a lot of fun to make even though it totally goes against my food philosophy.  I have never made anything fried before and was equally grossed out and fascinated at the same time.  I didn’t actually try any of the slices myself (all that oil!!!) but my mom really loved them.

Fun fact:  My dad actually picked up Tomatilloes instead of green tomatoes.  Has anybody ever tried one of these things????  They look like some kind of alien pod!!!!  Not to mention the taste is the most bizarre, unique and totally unexpected thing I have ever eaten.  They seriously taste like a cross between a kiwi and a tomato–salty and sweet at the same time.  But everybody liked them so they still worked in the recipe!

Tomatillo

This Mother’s Day was a lot of fun.  There were a lot of laughs, a lot of good food, and a lot memories that we will all cherish forever.  I am so blessed to have such a wonderful family.

Happy Mother’s Day to my mom, one of the strongest, most loving people I know.  Thank you for always being there for me when I was down and for lifting me up and assuring me that I was a good person.  Thank you for all of the hugs, the encouraging notes, the muffins you buy for me, and the endless support that I desperately needed during my recovery from my eating disorder.  Thank you for never giving up on me and always coming back even when we fight.  But most of all, thank you for loving me unconditionally, no matter who I am, what I’ve done, or what I’ve done to you.

I love you Mom.

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Workout Rockout

If you have ever seen me working out at the gym, then you know I’m crazy.  The second I climb up on the elliptical, I clip on my Ipod, turn my music up full blast and take off.  Now you may be thinking, “Well sure, I do the same thing.  I LOVE working out with music.  What’s so strange about that?”

That my friends is where the similarities end.  You see, I am a rare breed of exerciser because…………………

I like to sing while I workout.  And not just sing, I usually dance too, and flail my arms about, and pound the handles of the machine in time to the awesome beat of the drums.

When I exercise, it’s more than just a time to burn off some calories and break a sweat.  It pretty much becomes a private audition for American Idol.

Yea.  I’m pretty much like that guy.

Except I’m not a guy.

And I don’t sing out of tune.

And I promise I sound a WHOLE lot better.

But it’s not like I do it on purpose.  I just can’t help but sing along to the tunes jamming on my Ipod.  The second I hear the music start up I just get all excited and fired up and completely lose myself in the music. I’ve tried holding it back  but I find that I just cannot keep quiet.  Before long I’m belting out tunes like I was all alone in the choir room, but unfortunately, I’m not, and about a thousand other people are working out right next to me staring at me like I’m a complete lunatic.

source:

I would love to see myself on camera sometime when I’m working out.  I’m sure I look like a total weirdo who has completely lost her mind.  But you know what?  I really don’t care.

When I rock out to the songs on my Ipod it motivates me to exercise.  It pushes me to go harder, faster, and longer than I would if I was tunes-free.   Not to mention by the time I’m done I’m sweating like a pig and my hair is drenched with sweat.  So much for straightening my hair beforehand….

Um…ICK.

Also, singing is my passion.  It is freeing, liberating, and if I may say so, something I am pretty darn good at doing.  I always have a song playing around in my head no matter what.

So what about you? 

Do you like to sing while you work out?  Or are you one of those people who are totally creeped out by your vocally-gifted challenged workout buddies?

Top 5 Favorite songs this week:

1.  Red–“Outside”

2.  Red–“Faceless”

3.  Red–“Feed the Machine”

4.  Glee–“Don’t Stop Believing”

5.  Evanescence–“Tourniquet”

Chocolate for Breakfast

Lately it seems that pancakes have taken over my houshold.  Ever since I made my mom’s molasses wheat germ pancakes I have been OBSESSED.  Let’s see…. Today’s Friday right?  Out of 5 days this week I think I have made these pancakes about 4 times.

And I’m still not tired of them. 

But this morning I was feeling a bit crazy, and decided to take it one step further.

I was craving pancakes.  I was craving chocolate. 

Hmmm…. I wonder what would happen if I combined the two……

source:

I’m an evil genius.

Be careful cause these babies are dangerous!!

Dutch Chocolate Pancakes for one

Ingredients:

1/2c Oat Flour

3 TB Wheat Germ

2 TB Flax Seed Meal

1/2tsp baking powder

1 TB Cocoa Powder

1/2c lite chocolate soymilk (you can also use original soymilk, or almond milk)

1/4 cup egg whites

But what really made these pancakes shine was my signature chocolate sauce.  I invented this stuff on a whim a couple of months ago and have been known to slather it on anything from pancakes, to oatmeal, to french toast, to apples slices.

Raina’s Chocolate Sauce

Ingredients:

2 TB Almond Milk (use can more or less milk depending on how thick you want the sauce to be)

2 TB Cocoa Powder

A couple drops of Stevia to taste

Directions:  Whisk firmly in a small bowl with the tip of a knife or a spoon until the cocoa powder breaks down and eventually blends in with the milk.  The result is a super creamy, super rich, super decant chocolate sauce.  O-MAY-ZING!

There they are cooking in the pan.

OooOOooh look how chocolatey.

Needless to say, I had a VERY happy belly this morning.

Waiting for the Bad News…

This morning I awoke to the strangest smell wafting through the house and upstairs into my room.  I was still groggy so I couldn’t quite indentify what it was yet.  It was savory, salty, and had just a hint of a smoky texture.  Suddenly I realized what it was.  Bacon.

source:

Ugh.

Ummmm….excuse me, BACON??!!  I’m a vegetarian so I obviously don’t eat bacon but I still kind of like the smell.  Does that make me a bad vegetarian?  FAIL.

Guess it’s going to be one of those mornings……

I thought I would start off this week by posting one of my hardest challenges for the month of May.  This month is going to be a HUMONGASEOUS challenge for me though and I’m kind of scared about what’s going to happen.

Right now I am waiting on the results from my doctor.  Last Sunday I spent a good 30 minutes with this bad boy to figure out just what is wrong with my knee.

Has anyone ever had to take an MRI??  They are actually kind of scary.  For a straight 30 minutes I had to lay strapped to that bed completely stationary while I listened to this continuous whirring, buzzing, clicking, banging, and beeping that the giant machine made.  Thankfully I was only getting tests done for my knee though so I didn’t have to slide all the way inside the tube.  I’m not usually claustrophic but I’m pretty sure that if I did all that noise and cramped space would have totally freaked me out!  I’ve also heard that the bigger the area you are getting scanned the longer you have to stay in there.  Thirty minutes was bad enough but I can’t even imagine a whole HOUR!!!

Moving on….

Anyways, so my knee has been having some serious problem for the last….don’t yell at me….year.

It hurts like hell some days.  It stiffens up when I walk.  I have trouble balancing on it when I stand.  It frequently gives out on me when I move and sometimes it feels like the very fibers are tearing inside of it.

For a while I ignored it. Ignored it. Ignored it.  I didn’t want to go in and get it checked out because I was terrified that the doctor was going to say that I couldn’t exercise.  If you read my last post then you know just how difficult it is for me to give up exercise.

But after months of it not getting better and having extreme pain I finally decided that ENOUGH WAS ENOUGH.  I need to take care of my body and give it the rest and respect and love it deserves.  It’s going to be a long hard haul to get it healed but I know I need to do this.

Without a doubt this is going to be the hardest thing I have ever done.  I have been so enslaved by exercise that I haven’t been able to take off even ONE DAY in a year.

Yes, I did exercise on Christmas.  I have my ways.

But I know I need to do this.  If I can just make it through however long the “rest” period is going to be then I will once and for all finally be able to break this vicious hold.  I will finally be able to trust my body and trust that it will not gain weight and that it is not just going to end up all mushy and that everything is going to be okay.  This is pretty much the last step in truly breaking free from my eating disorder.  It will allow me to finally live my life to the fullest and enable me to do the minstry work I know that God has planned for me.

So, even though I have just started out in the blogging world, I’m asking for a small favor.

Will you guys please help me through this?

I’m going to need tons of support, tons of positive affirmations and information about how not being able to exercise is not going to kill me or make me fat.

I will post the bad news as soon as I hear back from my doctor.

Thank you so much.

I love you Gym, I hate you Gym

If I were featured on the Dr. Phil show, this is how my story would go:

I have an abusive boyfriend.  His name is Gym.  The thing is, Gym never used to be abusive.  In fact he used to be quite good to me.  He made me beam with pride and accomplishment when I could run my cross country races without stopping once to walk.  He cheered me on when I challenged myself to go beyond my limits and succeeded!  He was always there to lift me up and made me feel good about myself when I was having a rough day.

But somewhere along the lines, Gym’s attitude changed.  It all started when he teamed up with one of his best buddies, Anorexia.

Anorexia is a real bitch. 

She completely warped my relationship with Gym.  Suddenly Gym started getting really nasty.  He would constantly hound me, telling me that I was never good enough, and that I could never be good enough.  He said that I was fat and ugly, lazy and completely worthless.  Desperate to stop his relentless tormenting, I tried to appease him by spending even more time with him.  But it was never enough.  A half hour turned into a full hour, and then two hours, and then three hours.  Yet he still demanded more.  In just a few months time I quickly found out that it was no longer any fun spending time with Gym but I still couldn’t break off the relationship. 

 There were a few times I considered escaping, but Gym immediately swooped in reminding me in a low, crooning voice that he owned me and without him I would never survive.  Deep down, I knew that he was right and reluctantly ran back into his embrace every time.  Sometimes when Gym was feeling particularly mean and upset he would invite Anorexia over to further harrass me.  Anorexia told me that I was fat, that I didn’t have any muscle tone, and that I didn’t deserve to eat that day because I hadn’t spent enough time with Gym.  They would hold me down and scream profanities and names in my face until at last, with tears streaming down my cheeks, I was forced to obey.  Those were the most painful moments of my life.

I’m sure you’re familiar with my boyfriend.  You’ve probably seen him yanking me along like a chained slave.  Day after day he forces me to spend time with him, never at once listening to my urgent pleas for rest.   There are some days when I don’t mind being around him at all though.  He can still be really sweet and encouraging, especially when he sees the progress that I have made in my fitness goals.  Those are the characteristics that I like about him the best.  However, other times he is a grueling army sargeant and demands that I continue to stay with him even though my knee is crying out in pain from being injured.  I hate that side of him.  No, I loathe that side of him.

I must warn you that even though Gym does have a lot of good qualities, he is still very sly and cunning.  He can turn the simplest thing into a huge issue or completely warp the truth.  He is also an expert shape-shifter.

Sometimes he looks like this:

Other times he looks like this:

Or this:

Most days he appears in this form: 

Unfortunately, right now he’s  looking a lot like this:

He can be really ugly at this stage so I know I need to be careful.

The hard thing about our relationship is that most people approve.  I cannot tell you how many strangers have applauded me and told me how great it is that I am spending time with him.  I kind of want to strangle them because last year Gym almost did this to me:

No, I’m not kidding.  I told you he was scary.

Only my family and my friends truly know just how dangerous Gym can be.  They continually discourage me from going to him and just can’t understand why I won’t leave.  I wish they could understand…

These days Gym and I have ammended our relationship a bit, although he is still slightly controlling.  He is a lot kinder to me and has allowed me to cut back on the amount of time that we spend hanging out.  He understands that my body just cannot endure that kind of stress and abuse any longer and knows that I need to treat myself and my body with respect.  I’m glad that I have finally understood this about myself and can slowly begin to develop a more healthy mindset.  

 Eventually I would like to break up with Gym altogether because I don’t think he will ever change.  He can still be very hurtful and critical, especially when he sees other girls who look a lot leaner and fitter than myself.  But you know what?  I truly don’t think I will miss him that much.  In fact I’ve actually had my eye on another hottie for a while.  His name is Fitness.  He’s quite attractive too.

Disclaimer:  this is not to criticize any of you who adore working out.  I myself LOVE it!  I love the way it makes me feel and how strong I am getting.  But unfortunately my eating disorder has made my relationship with the gym very unhealthy.  This story is an example of that.

And in the Morning, I’m makin’ WAFFLES!

Err…..Pancakes.

Yesterday I had the most amaze-a-balls breakfast!  Behold!On the plate–wheat germ pancakes.  In the bowl–plain yogurt, cocoa powder, stevia, protein powder.

I made up this delicious batch of whole wheat, flax seed, wheat germ pancakes.  My mom has been making these  pancakes for my sister every morning for the past few weeks.  After drooling over them for so long I finally decided to just make some for myself.  They came out perfect!  I love their rich wheat flavor and how they rise and get really fluffy if you cook them just a few minutes longer.  Mmmm…just how I like my pancakes!!

Molasses Wheat Germ Pancakes for one (adapted from Natural Healing Cookbook which I highly recommend)

Makes about 6 small pancakes

Ingredients:

1/2c Oat  Flour

3 TB Wheat Germ

2 TB Flax Seed Meal

1/2c Soy or Almond Milk

1/4c Eggwhites

1 TB Applesauce

1 TB Molasses (optional if you want it sweeter)

1 tsp baking powder

Note: if the batter is too thin you add in more flour until it’s thick enough.

Served with a side of carrots and peanut butter.

Look how fluffy!!

Well, my tummy is having a fit right now so I’d better get some brekkie for myself.  Hmm…..I think I’ll make pancakes again!

Fashion Friday

I have been a huge lover of fashion ever since my middle school days.  Back then it was all about accessories and spending hours trying to style my hair into something intricate and interesting.  These days my personal style has evolved into something very chic, simple and vintage.  I am so glad that I can finally fit into cute clothes again.  A year ago I was at such a low weight in my eating disorder that all I could ever wear was my workout clothes.  Ehhhh—BORING!!!    I try not to follow the trends in the magazines or on the racks and instead create my own unique look.  Anyways, here are some photos of what I wore this week.  Please excuse the poor quality of photos.  I don’t yet have a good camera so right now I have to settle for my camera phone…

Okay so I actually didn’t buy this, BUT I am planning on getting it as soon as a get a J-O-B.  Nautical striped trench coat, black dress pants.

I love this outfit.  Grey sparkly striped tee from TJMaxx, plaid blue button up lace shirt from Plato’s Closet, black leggings.

This was my interview outfit for this week.  My mom acutally helped me pick out that shirt when we went on our little shopping spree for my birthday.  We call it the “Wedding Shirt” because it is this gorgeous blend of mauve and slate grey, the exact colors in my mother’s wedding.  Grey throw from TJMaxx, Wedding Shirt from TJMaxx, black dress pants.

Another fave.  Grey shrug, black lace tee, black leggings, grey scarf from Target.

H&M denim button up belted with oatmeal-colored Forever 21 short sleeve cardigan (This was about 10 bucks at Plato’s!! I love the giant wooden buttons!), black leggings.

Off white button up shirt dress, black belt from Forever 21, grey leggings.

Close up of the necklace.

Well, that’s all from this week!  I hope you enjoyed.  I do alot of  thrift shopping and love getting clothes off the clearance racks .  I have been able to find some really cute pieces this way!  My favorite places to shop are good ole Target, Forever 21, Plato’s Closet, and TJMaxx.

Have a good day!!

First Post!!

Hello everybody!!

I’m so excited to start blogging on my new site!!  I usually write on my other blog www.breakingfreefromthesechains.wordpress.com.  It’s a recovery/ministry blog documenting my progress in recovery from an eating disorder and what the Lord has taught me along the way.  I plan on eventually using it to start my own ministry in working with girls who have eating disorders.

Anyways, I really just wanted something fun where I don’t have to be all serious all the time.  Life is way than just living with an eating disorder and I’ve finally begun to claim that for myself!!  So I decided to start Girl Meets Soy to go along with that.  This is  just going to be a random mish-mash of my life.  It’s going to be lots of fun, have lots of posts about food, music, fashion, books, and anything else that pops into my head.  It’s basically me on paper…..er….electronic paper.

Well, here goes.  I hope you enjoy reading!!!